But today, I got mad.
Yeah ignorance is bliss.
It's true,
its so much easier to be ignorant, and visiting this place today....my heart wanted to bundle up in ignorance again, pretending i never saw what I did.
Pretending I didn't have to hear what I did.
I'm pretty darn tough,
but today broke me.
I've never had the thought, "Jesus, please take these kids lives right now because they will be better off with you. Please don't make them live another second like this."
But i did...many times that thought flooded my mind. It's hard to explain, and i just want to give you a glimpse.
To tell you of what i was wrecked of today...the world is SO much bigger than what is around you every day.
No matter how much we try to deny it, it's the truth.
And ugh today...well, I lost it.
Trying to remind myself to see through the eyes of God..not from my human fallible eyes.
"See the good, Jessica.
Don't focus on the ugly.
Look for good."
But I really struggled, to be honest.
So tonight I'm approaching the Throne of Grace, desperate for more.
And seeking what I can do to even shed some light on what was brought into my day today.
Got to end my night with some pretty wonderful tickles and laughs, though.
oh so fabulous it was!
And today, we got to bring a little girl home to her daddy.
Redemption...it's happening.
And even in the midst of dark, may we never miss it.
The good.
It's always there!
When I said, "My foot is slipping,"
your love, Oh Lord, supported me.
When anxiety was great within me,
your consolation brought JOY to my soul.
Psalm 94:18,19.
Today I met joy.
Children with no "logical" reason for it all...
children with every right to be angry and bitter.
Nope, there it was again....smiles...JOY...
Joy is something so powerful!
So tonight, amidst hurt, praise the Lord I'm covered in Joy!
Singing and dancing extra loudly tonight because of this joy, too.
The joy that moves my feet in the dark nights and the brightest days.
Oh sweet Joy, keep moving my feet to dance wildly in the grace offered to me every. single. moment.
Beautiful song.
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