A year ago.

A year ago.

A year ago today, I was just accepted into the volunteer program at Ekisa, completely naive about everything having to do with Africa.

A year ago today, I was anticipating graduation.

Struggling with having too high of an ego about being ready for the world and being completely grown up... ready to move on with life away from all that I’ve ever known.

Because in my mind at the moment, I was completely grown up.

I did have it all together.

And i was ready to take on the world.

Ready to show the world what I was made of.

A year ago today, I was discovering a new season of my life.

I was changing and things and people in my life were changing as well.

A year ago today, I was about to graduation with a great reputation.

A year ago today, I still got in my uniform each morning and walked into a school that was familiar to me. That i had grown to love. And that had changed me for the better.

But still, I was completely unaware of how greatly that place would affect me and change my heart forever.

And today, I can sit back and marvel at it all -- this past year. 

When i was journaling this morning, I almost lost my breath as I looked at the date I had just written out.

April 4th, 2012

It’s just bizarre to me, everything that has happened since then. 

In a years time, I’ve gone from naive high schooler to adoption coordinator in Uganda, Africa.

In a years time, I’ve had to experience and deal with death, even the death of sweet children that I had loved.

In a years time, I’ve learned (and am still learning more and more) what freedom looks like. And how stunning freedom is when we really grasp it.

In a years time I’ve seen things that I never would have thought I’d have to.

In a years time I’ve learned more about my imperfection than I’ve ever really wanted to.

Because in my mind, according to my reputation I was pretty darn perfect.

And i forgot to focus on the real me, the imperfect me in need of grace.

And that I am loved for me and redeemed, completely redeemed and transformed under grace.

In a years time, I’ve grown friendships. 

Old ones and completely new ones.

And in a years time, I’ve just learned a lot.

And this concept of a year -- a whole year -- passing is blowing my mind. 

But today as I’m writing this, I feel completely free.

Free in redemption and free to be who I was made to be.

And I can physically feel it, a love that is beyond this world.

And hope that is beyond anything that we can see.

And freedom.

And yes, I will mess up about 234384729384723 more times.

Maybe even more than that.

But its these things I’m learning as I grow that are beautiful.

That remind me there is so much more to this life.

And with that, it helps the hard things seem less hard.... when its from the perspective of this life being temporary.

When its from the perspective of living in this world as citizens of an entire different Kingdom. 

A year ago, I was far from perfect.

And today, I still am... perhaps even farther.

But it’s exciting, when we look at things from the perspective of being able to learn from every little thing in our past, to look back on this year.

And as easter is approaching, I encourage you to examine your past year.

Because everything that has happened between then and now, He died and rose for. 

Yes, He died for us.

For you.

For me.

To carry us on through this life as citizens of His own.

So this easter. I’m trying to focus on what it all means. And how this little life of mine can do something of significance for the truths of easter.

For the truths that should affect our daily lives and therefore, affect the lives of those around us (even though so often i don’t allow it to affect mine.)

“It’s hard to imagine that Jesus would endure the agony of the Cross just to keep us in line. Jesus began a revolution to secure our freedom. The new covenant that He established puts its trust not in the law, but in the transforming power of God’s Spirit living within us. The revolution of the human heart would fuel the life and vitality of this movement. We would delight in God, and He would give us the desires of our hearts. With our hearts burning for God, we would move forward with the freedom to pursue the passions burning within us. Because Jesus did not suffer and die so that we could build for ourselves havens, but so that we might expand the Kingdom of His love. Because invisible kingdoms are at war for the hearts and lives of every human being who walks on the face of this earth.”

-Erwin Raphael McManus

Today, be challenged.

Be forgiven.

Be hopeful.

Be passionate.

Be driven.

Be reminded of what matters,

that life doesn’t go on forever (not life on this earth anyways).

Be loved.

And therefore, love.

Look at what is in front of you, and be grateful for it.

For it all.

The good and the bad.

Today,

forgive.

Soak in life.

And examine where you are at and where this past year has taken you.

And be.free.

When He said “It is finished” on the cross,

well, He meant it.

He covered it all.

And all to Him we owe.

Much love :)