With eyes wide open. (a journal of mine)
Eyes wide open is exactly how God intended for us to live our lives.
But so often we awake, with eyes shut. Or sometimes when they are open, we are just searching for the first opportunity to shut them.
And most of the time, we don’t even realize how shut our eyes really are.
It’s easy. And sometimes, it makes sense to drift away into routine. And praising Jesus for the awesome truths in His word and how they make us feel happy and secure and safe.
And then we can stop there.
With a good feeling on the inside.
Continuing on in our days.
And then when we need comfort we run run run to the Bible.
Looking for that one verse that will remind us that He does have our best interest in mind!
And while that is true, He truly does.
We stop there, with a good feeling on the inside.
And then our days amount to a self-indulged, civilized faith.
One that slowly pulls us into this mindset that God is some type of sedative to keep us calm and under control by dulling our senses.
One that gives us comfort in morality and legalism.
One that relates to right and wrong as moral obligation.
One that gets us through the day and just onto the next.
Instead of knowing that we are no longer prisoners of space and times -- that we are citizens of the Kingdom of God! Like, what?!
And we must know that God is not a sedative. He does not desire for us to be dulled to reality in a false sense of security. In fact, He desires quite the opposite.
He awakens our spirit to be truly alive.
Instead of seeing right and wrong as a moral obligation, we are called to love good and hate evil. To be passionate about the very things that are on the heart of God. We are called to be moved from the inside -out.
Not motivated by a moral obligation. No, its not that at all.
Ezekiel 36:26-28
“And I will give you a new heart, and a new spirit I will put within you. And i will remove the heart of stone from your flesh and give you a heart of flesh. And i will put my Spirit within you, and cause you to walk in my statutes and be careful to obey my rules. You shall dwell in the land that i gave to your fathers, and you shall be my people, and I shall be your God.”
See,
In reality, we aren’t supposed to just get through the day. His Spirit in us -- we wake to live and live fully alive -- with our eyes wide open.
Because somehow its easy to be caught under being civilized and forget about the power that is there. The very power of God.
And this power motivates us to love and to move.
And sometimes, this power can cause us to just be still.
To simply take the next step under the knowledge of what life is all about.
And to carry on under freedom.
Freedom freedom freedom.
We are NO LONGER OPPRESSED.
And as long as we choose to move through life under an oppressive set of rules -- legalism -- we are not truly living free.
And when we are set free, we are moved to get closer to the heart of life -- to the heart of the very Creator.
You cannot meet the Creator of the universe and remain the same.
Sometimes, the change is slow. There is no “manual” for how this goes...no one prayer that changes everything.
But its just true, that we will just not remain the same.
It’s not possible.
Matthew 22:29
Jesus replied, “You are in error because you do not know the scriptures or the power of God.”
Ha, i know this is directed towards me most of the time.
So I’m learning to read and to dig into and to know the scriptures.
And i’m being awakened to the true power of God.
God is not just what you are told in school.
God is not just what you are told in church.
God is not a “subject” to be taught.
God is not found under a list of rights and wrongs.
God is alive.
Moving about in this world.
Everywhere.
He. just. is.
Yearning for us to know Him -- to really know Him.
And to carry on in life with eyes wide open.
Because He has so much for us to see -- when we are truly looking.
SOOOOOO a lot of crazy stuff has been going on here in good ole Uganda. Things that I can’t publicly share at this time. But i do ask you to pray. Pray for this country and for the people placed in charge to govern it. Corruption is very clear here and I’ve never been a part of it like this, firsthand.
It’s all new to me. It’s scary. And it’s a lot.
People’s lives at stake.
A lot at stake.
And boy I’m seeing the truth of the statement “Ignorance is bliss”
I came here to work adoptions and plans have certainly changed! A lot has happened, and I’m thankful that I got to be here at such a time to serve. Serve in a way that I wasn’t really planning on -- but hey I’m learning that with eyes wide open, plans ALWAYS can change.
And that I am not in control.
Amidst the craziness, last sunday we had the most beautiful Easter.
It started with a STUNNING sunrise and the birds seemed to be singing extra loud on that day, seriously.
And then after a beautiful church service outside under the trees, we headed home for a pizza party.
And 18 kids, all of the staff got to sit on the front porch together.
Eating Pizza.
And it was beautiful. Because at that moments, no barriers existed. Our minds were clear and free to embrace the truths of the day.
And there we sat, just like one big family eating pizza together!
We laughed, sang, and ate....a lot.
And everyone was just at peace.
These kids weren’t concerned about their futures. About any sort of timeline for their life.
They were just concerned about what was in front of them -- pizza and everyone they love the most.
And so I took after them, and just sat and embraced everything that was in front of me.
The kids that my very heart beats for.
The most wonderful friendships I have had the chance of making.
And a beautiful cool day, reminding me of the reason that we are all alive and able to live in freedom, after-all.
Because our God is alive.
Sometimes when you work in things like “orphan-care” or whatever you want to call it, its easy to forget to be still. To remember the reason why you are even working in the first place!
It’s so easy to get caught up in the tasks of the day and forget about the reason all of these tasks are happening.
The reason that I’m on the other side of the world, anyways.
So what a perfect day to be still, and remember.
And to re-focus.
And to just be soaked in thankfulness -- gratitude apart from any results or situations.
Gratitude for however life plays out.
And that regardless of where God chooses to take me next, this Easter sunday was perfect.
And this season in my life is perfect.
So i’m learning to continue on with my eyes just open.
Open and available to what’s next.
And in whatever is next, I will dance on.
And laugh on.
Because at the end of the day, at the end of the hard, life still is about JOY.
And my word it is such a good thing.
“We look to Him to lead us where HE needs us most and where we ( in our own unique selves) can accomplish the most good.”
Much love :)
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